Idle BANDIT Banter

Thanks AngryWoman, I'll look over for those types of errors.

Addition Edit: Also I've made the document open for editing now. Should've been like that to begin with. I'd appreciate if you could look it over quickly again specifically for comma issues. I've corrected most full stop issues (darn cut and paste messups) and the filepath error.

 

Thanks for the positive feedback guys. After assigning race/gender conditions I did notice there's  room for more variety. Currently there's a rough average of 2+ lines per race/gender combo. would be nice to bring it up to 3-4 with about 5-6 for dunmer due to frequency. I'll come up with some more when I have the time. If anyone's got a real good one feel free to post in this thread along with race and gender if applicable.

To whoever decided to delete a good portion of the lines I made public in the doc. Please, get a life. I made a backup because of people like you. Have a nice day.

@Entreri
I think your lines have potential. a couple of suggestions:

I like your first two are drunken songs, that can be funny, heartwrenching or add immersion but I don't think they're quite there yet. First off why is the dunmer sobbing at the end? does he miss Vivec? yeah OK but it's not that clear why or what happened. Can he not go back? important to give some expository info to connect the player I think. Also the more lore based references the better so really try to pack something meaningful into the few lines (think religion, tradition, heroes of old etc). The line is OK as is except for the voice actor has no clue what melody to sing. It's important to make it easy for the VAs (who already have a lot of work) so for this reason I often shy away from songs unless already in the game. I think it could work though. maybe find a real world simple song to reference for the melody?

With the nord song I'm a little unsure of references like "talos night". Is it lore based? I like the idea though, maybe just rewrite with more concrete lore in mind or maybe I just don't know the reference. (once again melody would be a good idea)

Your last three are pretty good as is, 3rd one is good as is, the redguard one I'd change blowing nose to shivering. easier for VAs to do and won't look funny with no animation.

Last one needs to be rewritten so only one character is speaking. Idle Bandit banter does not allow for "scenes" with two NPCs because of how it is being implemented. Like the idea though. Just rewrite it along the lines of "I wonder what ever happened to that wood elf wizard tahriel? Always had me fetching things or whatever, up to you!

Looking forward to seeing re-writes.
 

@Connstar

I appreciate the attempt but I don't think all the lines quite fit (nord one is good tho). I'll point out why so that you can have a better sense of what we're looking for in terms of content.

More than anything these lines have to be lore based friendly and you've done that with your first two one's about kwama holes and the "bugs" of morrowind. The issue I have with them is how they're written, word choice more than anything. 

for example your first line:

If I learned one thing in this province... It's that you should never empty yourself in kwama holes. Never. Still can't sit.

no one in TES i've ever heard has used the term "empty" to describe taking a dump (it's kind of archaic as is) maybe "I had to take a netch sized dump or something funnier? Also "Kwama Holes", I can guess what you mean but it doesn't quite fit how Kwama are represented. They aren't red ants. they're quite a bit bigger and tend to roam tunnels more than holes. The line could be reworked potentially though.
With your second line "bugs" is a term that doesn't really pop up in game even though I know what you're referring to. Also opening up a line with " on your first day here you thought you've seen many big bugs" is just awkward. Has he only been in morrowind for one day? is he talking to someone else? also grammar, you've seen many big bugs sounds kind of weird.

Your other lines just don't really add all that much to the player's immersion/lore or seem to hint at something not fully fleshed out. bagpag is maybe meant to be backpack? that line could be good, maybe give more context, an event or something that makes it stand out.
the Nord one is good. Is it meant to be slightly sing-song? I think I'll take it as is. 

Lastly your last one about incest is slightly out of place. Incest is not a common theme for nords in elder scrolls, it could possibly work but then I was thrown off by "shot him in the privy". "Privy" does not fit with the world (once again, slightly archaic in english already and brother shot him sounds like he used a gun. A lot of these ideas have seeds of potential but just need to fit more flawlessly into the world using morrowind jargon. Feel free to give them another go.

I think I may keep the nord one though, especially if the VA does it in kind of an optimistic self satisfied type of voice followed by genuine confusion.

I hope I'm not coming across as too picky. Your lines are already better than the idle vanilla morrowind lines IMO. We just want to really wow people with the writing. I see potential!

Ahh I get the tyrion lannister reference now haha. Yeah give it another go.

@entreri
These are really good! I took a quick look over them and only saw a few minor things that would need fixing. I like the new songs. Basically just small things like replacing the word "heavenly", which is a n real world religious term (aetherius maybe instead?). I'm currently traveling so I can't send specific feedback for a few days but I'll when I can I'll highlight the few possible changes to finalize the script and send it back for your OK. Good work on these stellar lines!

Duplicate Removed

@enteri
Are you OK with the following changes:

Heavenly, that was.

to

I might have a chance at this bard thing after all.

and

It's in these times I miss Tarhiel the most.

to

It sure was a good gig working for that mage, Tarhiel

I also have a slight concern with using a specific name like Azbael in a line due to how frequently and all over the place one would encounter bandits saying it. Perhaps changing it to this?

"Is anyone there? Cheating bastard..."

@entreri, Will do!
@asmarth, thanks for your submission but the nature of the lines is monologue in nature. The Idle Banter thread could use some work still if you'd like to help out in some capacity. Just search for Justafan's thread under Skywind threads.

I think we have a good number of lines now so I'll be closing submissions. Thanks to everyone who submitted lines!